I don’t have any children of my own, and before you offer to give me yours, let me also mention that I have never had the strengths required to be mother material. Your kid is better off with you. Or the military school you’ve put it in.
Not having had the benefits of studying, up close, the behaviours and learning stages that a child goes through, from squealing newborn to sullen teenager, as an on-looker I find it fascinating that a baby can grow up to communicate with the rest of us and to function within the parameters of the society that it finds itself in, within such a relatively short time frame. It’s kind of mind-blowing, isn’t it?
For instance, a young toddler who can barely haul itself up onto its feet and move, with sticky hands stretching towards whatever the most dangerous and life-threatening object in the room is, will be capable of making its own TikTok dance videos within a handful of years. Then again, when that same child hits its growth spurt during the teen years, it will once more take several months to figure out how to use its new body to accomplish perilous things like walking without tripping.
They tell me that by the age of 2, a child has figured out what its own name is and calls itself by that name. What an abstraction. Especially as that same kid started without a spoken language at all and has had to learn the concept of the surrounding world and their place within. All in 2 short years. Also amazing is that the child agrees to go by whatever name was picked out for it, without having had a say in the matter. Mind you, it will probably go on to change that name either subtly or drastically, by the time it flunks out of college and decides to go tree planting in northern B.C. instead.
Twenty four short months into this crazy life journey, a kid has probably been able learn how to feed itself using a spoon. I just read that by 6, with instruction, a child can master the technique of operating chopsticks to do the same job. Are you embarrassed now about what a mess you are when you go to that Chinese food place downtown and have to ask for a fork? Good. If a 6-year-old can master eating with chopsticks, so can you!
Mustn’t the changing seasons surprise a young child? To have their normal environment morph into a completely different one and then eventually change back to what it was before, without anyone else being bumfuzzled by the switch, would/should be confusing. Mind you, I wonder if a state of constant confusion isn’t just the normal resting state for children up to the age of say, 26.
A child will conquer the ability to jump off a short step at 30 months, usually provoking a chorus of wild applause from bystanders. 13 years later it will be driving your car while you sit in the passenger seat silently telling yourself that you’re not having a stroke.
By the age of 3, a child has usually learned the skills needed to dress itself, even if somewhat poorly. A decade later, you may find that it insists on wearing only the pieces that it has personally picked out for reasons that make absolutely no sense and that have zero consideration for what season it currently is. Wait. I just remembered that that same scenario also plays out in some families during the early grades and tends to intensify depending on how important looking ‘put together’ is to the parent.
Sidebar: Two years ago, I saw a kid wearing an inflatable unicorn costume on its way to the elementary school next door. It was May.
I have no idea of how teachers can possibly teach the concept of Time to a child but somehow, by the end of grade one, they seem to understand what Time is, how to quantify it, and that we slot things into certain amounts of it. Imagine trying to explain to another adult what Time is and how it is used and perceived. Maybe it’s one of those esoteric concepts that can only be learned by a first grader.
Kids are pretty young when they start losing their baby teeth and that sort of episode must be astounding to them. Even if they’ve seen other kids lose their teeth, surely it is unsettling when their first one starts to wiggle and then, POPS OUT OF THEIR MOUTH (hopefully). Who could anticipate that several of their teeth, which they’ve probably taken for granted (something that stops in the mid 50s), would come out—sometimes by force—and new ones slowly grow in to replace them? I hope parents stress that this only ever happens once per tooth and that in the future, should teeth come out, no one will be swooping in at night to leave them cash in exchange. In fact, the very opposite happens. Dentists will put teeth back INTO your head, but only for a price that will make your eyes water.
The field of art is one that really highlights this whole astounding metamorphosis of a child’s abilities. Leonardo da Vinci started out like the rest of us, clutching his crayons in his fist while scribbling in unpredictable ways on his parchments, and yet he went on to draw and paint work that continues to leave audiences breathless at its beauty.
Pablo Picasso didn’t ever really lose that youthful randomness of how things looked, although the execution of his work did tighten up over time.
The ability to learn, that we all have had pre-programmed into our brains, is astonishing and, they say, inexhaustible. We have each gone from being physically, emotionally, and cognitively lacking in any and all skills, to become the specimens that we present ourselves as today. We have somehow been able to find and retain the knowledge and competence to do amazing things. There isn’t an age when we stop learning about ourselves or about the world around us. In fact, every day generously hands us still another opportunity to learn, to explore, and to accomplish. If we stop learning, it’s usually by choice.
Remember that the next time you have to figure out the amount of the tip in your head. Or use chopsticks in public.
